Wednesday, September 4, 2024
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You are a fruit known for it's mild sweet flavour, with a pungent odour comparable to that of Limburger cheese.
Aries
21 Mar – 19 Apr
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You will be serenaded by a choir of opera-singing parrots during your morning commute. Enjoy the musical interlude!
Taurus
20 Apr – 20 May
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The birds are chirping, go outside and listen for a while.
Gemini
21 May – 20 Jun
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If your hand's bigger than a lobster's, you're in for a shock.
Cancer
21 Jun – 22 Jul
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Your smartphone will start downloading a constant stream of information about the world for no apparent reason.
Leo
23 Jul – 22 Aug
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Today you will suddenly find yourself transported into a strange alternate universe full of magic and wonders, but without any of the usual nonsense of everyday life
Virgo
23 Aug – 22 Sep
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Today you will encounter a mystical talking unicorn who will guide you on a journey of self-discovery.
Libra
23 Sep – 22 Oct
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A misunderstanding about dinner will lead to an amusing conversation about your different preferences. Remember, friendships are about embracing our differences and finding common ground, just like pizza and garlic bread can be a perfect pairing.
Scorpio
23 Oct – 21 Nov
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It's hard to be humble when you're an Aries.
Sagittarius
22 Nov – 21 Dec
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That persistent itching you keep ignoring is trying to tell you something. Stop scratching and go to the doctor already.
Capricorn
22 Dec – 19 Jan
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Beware of mischievous garden gnomes plotting to steal your shoes.
Aquarius
20 Jan – 18 Feb
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A family member's stubbornness will try your patience today. Don't get into a futile argument with them; instead, calmly explain your perspective and try to understand their point of view. It's not worth winning if it means losing their affection.
Pisces
19 Feb – 20 Mar
