Thursday, August 1, 2024
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The position of the moon in the cosmos dictates your fate, so proceed with caution.
21 Mar – 19 Apr
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The vibe-less feeling you experience today will dissipate after taking a brisk walk outdoors, leaving you with a newfound appreciation for the little things in life.
20 Apr – 20 May
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If a seahorse tries to sell you an oceanfront cabin, run away.
21 May – 20 Jun
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A beloved pet will unexpectedly display an uncanny ability today, such as fetching your mail or predicting the weather. This is a sign that you are blessed with an extraordinary entourage.
21 Jun – 22 Jul
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Turn a simple tax audit into a great success
23 Jul – 22 Aug
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Take your time.
23 Aug – 22 Sep
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Today you will realize there's a secret society of people with extremely long arms who swap paw prints among themselves
23 Sep – 22 Oct
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Today you will eat a whole box of chocolates and not get sick.
23 Oct – 21 Nov
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Don't try to fix anything until you know for sure that everyone knows it's broken. Save yourself the trouble and wait for the torrent of angry texts complaining that the internet isn't working.
22 Nov – 21 Dec
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There is no such thing as a stupid question. Except for the one you are about to ask.
22 Dec – 19 Jan
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It's okay to be afraid of the dark. But it's not okay to let it control you.
20 Jan – 18 Feb
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You will dream of being a butterfly today.
19 Feb – 20 Mar
