Thursday, August 1, 2024
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The position of the moon in the cosmos dictates your fate, so proceed with caution.
Aries
21 Mar – 19 Apr
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The vibe-less feeling you experience today will dissipate after taking a brisk walk outdoors, leaving you with a newfound appreciation for the little things in life.
Taurus
20 Apr – 20 May
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If a seahorse tries to sell you an oceanfront cabin, run away.
Gemini
21 May – 20 Jun
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A beloved pet will unexpectedly display an uncanny ability today, such as fetching your mail or predicting the weather. This is a sign that you are blessed with an extraordinary entourage.
Cancer
21 Jun – 22 Jul
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Turn a simple tax audit into a great success
Leo
23 Jul – 22 Aug
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Take your time.
Virgo
23 Aug – 22 Sep
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Today you will realize there's a secret society of people with extremely long arms who swap paw prints among themselves
Libra
23 Sep – 22 Oct
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Today you will eat a whole box of chocolates and not get sick.
Scorpio
23 Oct – 21 Nov
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Don't try to fix anything until you know for sure that everyone knows it's broken. Save yourself the trouble and wait for the torrent of angry texts complaining that the internet isn't working.
Sagittarius
22 Nov – 21 Dec
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There is no such thing as a stupid question. Except for the one you are about to ask.
Capricorn
22 Dec – 19 Jan
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It's okay to be afraid of the dark. But it's not okay to let it control you.
Aquarius
20 Jan – 18 Feb
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You will dream of being a butterfly today.
Pisces
19 Feb – 20 Mar
