Wednesday, July 31, 2024
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Attend a quinceañera with the ultimate chianti burger
Aries
21 Mar – 19 Apr
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There is an odd number of fingers on your left hand. I'm not sure if this is important. But it is weird.
Taurus
20 Apr – 20 May
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A bear will stop your ladder climbing today.
Gemini
21 May – 20 Jun
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If someone forgets your name, gently remind them--don't let awkwardness infest the relationship like moths to a sweater!
Cancer
21 Jun – 22 Jul
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You will forget the date today and spontaneously book a trip to Bora Bora for next month.
Leo
23 Jul – 22 Aug
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Don't give a Leo advice, they already know everything.
Virgo
23 Aug – 22 Sep
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Today you will find you can breathe underwater. Don't try this at home.
Libra
23 Sep – 22 Oct
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Have you been neglecting your potted plant? Sorry to bear bad tidings, but it will probably die today. Try spending more time with your other plants to make up for it.
Scorpio
23 Oct – 21 Nov
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Today you will notice a divine symmetry in nature, and will have a great revelation
Sagittarius
22 Nov – 21 Dec
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You can't resist clicking on Clickbait.
Capricorn
22 Dec – 19 Jan
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You will find yourself at a farmers market, for some reason.
Aquarius
20 Jan – 18 Feb
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You will be visited by a spirit from another realm.
Pisces
19 Feb – 20 Mar
