Saturday, June 15, 2024
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A bar of chocolate will cure almost all of your problems today. Except maybe lactose intolerance. Definitely avoid lactose intolerance.
Aries
21 Mar – 19 Apr
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If someone suggests a game of poker, be wary. Their tells may not be what they seem, especially if they're a fox.
Taurus
20 Apr – 20 May
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A foreign country will tell you it is excited to have you visit.
Gemini
21 May – 20 Jun
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Don't let the mules deceive you. Even though they may appear aloof, it is critical that you promptly address any molehills they erect, for they can metamorphose into mountains in no time.
Cancer
21 Jun – 22 Jul
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There is no point in trying to keep up with the Jones's, they are so far ahead of you and are cheating.
Leo
23 Jul – 22 Aug
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Your secret is safe with the lettuce.
Virgo
23 Aug – 22 Sep
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If the boss has an issue with your napping habits, mismatched socks will throw them off your scent. But don't get too comfortable, there's still work to be done!
Libra
23 Sep – 22 Oct
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It's time to break free from the confines of social media and embrace a sense of mystery in your life.
Scorpio
23 Oct – 21 Nov
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You will make it a habit to forgive others, but most importantly, you will learn to forgive yourself.
Sagittarius
22 Nov – 21 Dec
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You will receive an unexpected invitation to a fancy dress party. Wear something that makes you feel like a million dollars, and prepare to make an extravagant entrance.
Capricorn
22 Dec – 19 Jan
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Your friends will admire you today for your ability to converse on any topic. Within seconds you'll be able to talk to them about retractable ball-point pens andarezitively engaginzing.
Aquarius
20 Jan – 18 Feb
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You are experiencing vertigo today, so take it easy on the stairs
Pisces
19 Feb – 20 Mar
