Monday, September 2, 2024
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Today, you'll have a eureka moment where you realize that life is made up of 85 percent pretending
21 Mar – 19 Apr
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A profound appreciation for the simple joys of life, such as a perfectly ripe watermelon, will be yours today.
20 Apr – 20 May
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Today you will become a professional dart player.
21 May – 20 Jun
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You will become obsessed with font choice when writing things today.
21 Jun – 22 Jul
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You'll think of a great name for a band, but someone else will have already used it.
23 Jul – 22 Aug
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For those of you who live in the countryside, do not fear. There is no need to take your vegetables inside tonight, they will not be afraid of the cold.
23 Aug – 22 Sep
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Sometimes, the best way to solve a problem is to take a nap. Today is one of those days.
23 Sep – 22 Oct
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Make use of your morning commute to listen to kazoo remixes of Wagner
23 Oct – 21 Nov
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Be prepared for an unexpected encounter with a celebrity doppelganger. Take a selfie for proof!
22 Nov – 21 Dec
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You will gain a new appreciation for jelly/jello salad today.
22 Dec – 19 Jan
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If someone suggests a game of poker, be wary. Their tells may not be what they seem, especially if they're a fox.
20 Jan – 18 Feb
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The office funny man is just jealous of your new shirt. Wear it with pride.
19 Feb – 20 Mar
