Wacky Horoscopes — Virgo, August 25, 2024

You've got this hidden talent for juggling anonymously

Aries

21 Mar – 19 Apr

Your smartphone will start predicting the future with uncanny accuracy.

20 Apr – 20 May

Someone will tell you that you have food on your face. Don't respond with hostility, they are just trying to help.

21 May – 20 Jun

Today, you will feel the need to create. Do not do this with paint, as you have no artistic ability whatsoever.

21 Jun – 22 Jul

If you don't like a book, just remember, you don't have to finish it.

23 Jul – 22 Aug

Today you will accidentally shrink yourself and explore the miniature world.

23 Aug – 22 Sep

A group project will collapse under the weight of excessive optimism and poor planning. You will step in to save the day, but expect no gratitude.

23 Sep – 22 Oct

All cats are smart, but some cats are too smart for their own good.

23 Oct – 21 Nov

You are not the sassiest person in the room.

22 Nov – 21 Dec

You will accidentally turn your alarm clock into a time machine.

22 Dec – 19 Jan

Today you will get extremely bored, but also extremely horny.

20 Jan – 18 Feb

A lucky penny awaits you today, but it will be hidden in a bizarre place. Keep your eyes peeled.

19 Feb – 20 Mar