Thursday, March 28, 2024
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You will become obsessed with font choice when writing things today.
21 Mar – 19 Apr
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Today you'll discover that you can breathe underwater. Your next dive will be epic.
20 Apr – 20 May
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Today you will seek out a troll and give it a hug
21 May – 20 Jun
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Do not fear change, be the change you want to see in the world. Unless it's your money, then you better keep an eye on it.
21 Jun – 22 Jul
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Steal a hen from a farm with a Sagittarius girl
23 Jul – 22 Aug
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Today you will discover a hidden talent for knitting tiny sweaters for garden gnomes.
23 Aug – 22 Sep
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You will spontaneously grow a third arm today. While at first, this may be a nuisance, you will come to find that it has its own unique abilities. By the end of the day, you will be able to do everything three times as fast.
23 Sep – 22 Oct
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Today, you receive a hard drive containing the most raunchy movies imaginable.
23 Oct – 21 Nov
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You will receive an unexpected windfall in the form of a large fish.
22 Nov – 21 Dec
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The scent of lavender shall follow you throughout the day, lulling you into a state of calm and reassurance. Trust your instincts and follow your nose, for in this ethereal aroma lies a divine guiding force.
22 Dec – 19 Jan
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Today you will develop a sudden affinity for wearing mismatched socks.
20 Jan – 18 Feb
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You'll have a sudden infatuation with lava lamps. Be careful, it's highly addictive.
19 Feb – 20 Mar
