Wacky Horoscopes — Taurus, November 21, 2023

If you go to the toilet, you will be entertained.

Aries

21 Mar – 19 Apr

You may have to take a jump to the left before you can take a little step to the right.

20 Apr – 20 May

Today you will have an encounter with a magical talking squirrel who grants wishes.

21 May – 20 Jun

Today you will be visited by a talking teapot who will offer you words of wisdom over a cup of tea.

21 Jun – 22 Jul

Your hairbrush will gain sentience and start giving you daily pep talks.

23 Jul – 22 Aug

Stop getting your messages from a Ouija board. It's not safe.

23 Aug – 22 Sep

Move the matchstick close to your goats

23 Sep – 22 Oct

Shake hands with the Lord of England

23 Oct – 21 Nov

An owl will come and bring you some happiness.

22 Nov – 21 Dec

Time to put away your stamp collection. You'll never finish it anyway.

22 Dec – 19 Jan

Today someone will write a song about you. It'll be a fucking banger.

20 Jan – 18 Feb

You will soon be receiving good news.

19 Feb – 20 Mar