Tuesday, November 7, 2023
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Today you will take a self-assessment test. The results will surprise you. They will also be wrong.
Aries
21 Mar – 19 Apr
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Don't get discouraged if your yodelling career doesn't take off. Yodelling is a difficult and dying art form, that only a few can master.
Taurus
20 Apr – 20 May
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Today you will be bored ever since you became a grownup.
Gemini
21 May – 20 Jun
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You will receive an unexpected proposal today, and you will be forced to choose between two equally good options. Choose the third option.
Cancer
21 Jun – 22 Jul
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Today, you'll find yourself captivated by the intricate patterns formed by spilled coffee on the café table, unraveling a prophetic message for the day ahead.
Leo
23 Jul – 22 Aug
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At the club tonight, spin the wheel of destiny for amazing cosplay costumes
Virgo
23 Aug – 22 Sep
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There is no such thing as ghosts. You're safe.
Libra
23 Sep – 22 Oct
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The stock market is doing well, if you own stock in tofu nuggets.
Scorpio
23 Oct – 21 Nov
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Today you will notice a divine symmetry in nature, and will have a great revelation
Sagittarius
22 Nov – 21 Dec
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Today you can't seem to decide what to feel
Capricorn
22 Dec – 19 Jan
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When your alarm wakes you up way too early, your crooner K-pop alarm whistle will play to comfort you
Aquarius
20 Jan – 18 Feb
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All your friends are laughing behind your back. Kill them.
Pisces
19 Feb – 20 Mar
