Sunday, July 23, 2023
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Today you will discover that you've gone an entire day without being penalised for a missed deadline
Aries
21 Mar – 19 Apr
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Today you will discover a hidden talent for knitting tiny sweaters for garden gnomes.
Taurus
20 Apr – 20 May
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The best things in life are free. Especially if you stole them.
Gemini
21 May – 20 Jun
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You will meet your soulmate today, and they will be covered in hair.
Cancer
21 Jun – 22 Jul
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You will receive a mysterious package containing a talking cactus.
Leo
23 Jul – 22 Aug
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Find a fairy altar and allow nature spirits to influence your decisions
Virgo
23 Aug – 22 Sep
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Today you will accidentally dye your hair neon green.
Libra
23 Sep – 22 Oct
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Today you will receive an unsolicited visit from your son and daughter in-law and will not be allowed to leave until you've finished eating all of their home cooked meals.
Scorpio
23 Oct – 21 Nov
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Don't step on the broken glass today.
Sagittarius
22 Nov – 21 Dec
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You'll suddenly be overcome by a witchy urge to play Dungeons & Dragons.
Capricorn
22 Dec – 19 Jan
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Recreate a freemason ritual in your spare bedroom
Aquarius
20 Jan – 18 Feb
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Beware of falling acorns—they are plotting a squirrel uprising.
Pisces
19 Feb – 20 Mar