Sunday, March 30, 2025
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After years of work, you will finally be invited to exhibit at the Louvre
Aries
21 Mar – 19 Apr
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You are teleported into a parallel universe where every conversation ends with a question mark?
Taurus
20 Apr – 20 May
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If you were a dog, you'd be a good boy today.
Gemini
21 May – 20 Jun
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The meaning of life is:
Cancer
21 Jun – 22 Jul
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Prepare for a surprising twist during your daily commute when you stumble upon a hidden underground disco club on the subway.
Leo
23 Jul – 22 Aug
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An enemy will try to bring you down today. Don't worry, their efforts will prove futile because of your steadfast resolve and impeccable posture.
Virgo
23 Aug – 22 Sep
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Face your anxious mother-in-law with a grin and a box of chocolates
Libra
23 Sep – 22 Oct
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Today you will accidentally turn your vacuum cleaner into a time machine. Clean up the past and future simultaneously!
Scorpio
23 Oct – 21 Nov
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You are the chosen one, and the milk has been spilled. Today you will come into your new power.
Sagittarius
22 Nov – 21 Dec
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Time spent with a book is worth less than that with your next-door-neighbour's ferret.
Capricorn
22 Dec – 19 Jan
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Don't get fizzy, stick to the flat variety today.
Aquarius
20 Jan – 18 Feb
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Sometimes people say that we can't choose who we love. They're wrong. We can. We just don't make the right choice, which is the only possible problem with this plan.
Pisces
19 Feb – 20 Mar
