Wacky Horoscopes

You will be able to hear what your pets are saying today. It will drive you crazy.

Aries

21 Mar – 19 Apr

Your destiny lies in mastering the art of interpretive shadow puppetry; unleash your inner silhouette artist.

20 Apr – 20 May

You were almost a pro-gamer.

21 May – 20 Jun

Your partner is feeling snuggly.

21 Jun – 22 Jul

Prepare for a peculiar craving for pickles and ice cream—a delightful combination that defies logic but satisfies your taste buds.

23 Jul – 22 Aug

You have always felt a special connection to ants. Today you will feel that connection even more.

23 Aug – 22 Sep

Make sure you take the scenic route today, the earth needs more beauty in it.

23 Sep – 22 Oct

Beware of rogue umbrellas conspiring to take over the world.

23 Oct – 21 Nov

Don't buy any houses today. If you do, they'll be haunted.

22 Nov – 21 Dec

Giraffes look dorky but they're actually very dangerous. Keep your distance

22 Dec – 19 Jan

Don't forget your umbrella today, or you'll get wet.

20 Jan – 18 Feb

Today you will learn how to cook and will have homemade meals every day

19 Feb – 20 Mar