Wacky Horoscopes

You're not crazy, you're just in love.

Aries

21 Mar – 19 Apr

Enjoy some art, whatever form it takes. Only a firsthand experience can make it real.

20 Apr – 20 May

Today you will be followed by a trail of glitter everywhere you go.

21 May – 20 Jun

Today, you will transform your hand into a genie lamp, granting you wishes with pure awesome power. Check if you can reverse its effects.

21 Jun – 22 Jul

If you're feeling seasick, try looking at the horizon.

23 Jul – 22 Aug

Today you will realize someone took your letter, and you'll have to spend hours trying to recall what you've written

23 Aug – 22 Sep

Whatcha eating?

23 Sep – 22 Oct

Be weary of all old people on the beach today, especially those offering to help you bury your new pet.

23 Oct – 21 Nov

Your cooking skills will be unmatched today. Take the opportunity to make a new dish!

22 Nov – 21 Dec

Your trousers will all perish in a surprise wildfire

22 Dec – 19 Jan

If you're feeling seasick, try looking at the horizon.

20 Jan – 18 Feb

A flock of random seagulls will serendade you with a rendition your favourite song.

19 Feb – 20 Mar