Thursday, January 30, 2025
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You will have an important meeting today. It shall go well, especially if you wear blue.
Aries
21 Mar – 19 Apr
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Beware of rogue pineapples plotting to take over the fruit aisle at your local grocery store.
Taurus
20 Apr – 20 May
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There is a chance you will save a choking baby today.
Gemini
21 May – 20 Jun
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Don't wear those shoes with that belt.
Cancer
21 Jun – 22 Jul
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Take a breath with a Chilean Warrior
Leo
23 Jul – 22 Aug
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You will receive a letter that you have been waiting for. It will be written in a language you can't understand.
Virgo
23 Aug – 22 Sep
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A serendipitous discovery of a hidden map will set you off on a quest for the elusive fountain of youth, where you'll encounter a wise old wizard who will grant you one wish.
Libra
23 Sep – 22 Oct
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A bird will unexpectedly poop on you today. This is a sign that you need to let go of your worries and embrace the messiness of life. Clean yourself off and move forward with a positive outlook.
Scorpio
23 Oct – 21 Nov
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The scent of mocha coffee will recently invade your apartment, doubling your heart rate
Sagittarius
22 Nov – 21 Dec
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Your new favourite colour will be bubblegum.
Capricorn
22 Dec – 19 Jan
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Today, you're about to discover a source of major savings: surplus toilet paper.
Aquarius
20 Jan – 18 Feb
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Today you will discover a new sensation: itchy underwear. Don't worry, this is a sign of good luck.
Pisces
19 Feb – 20 Mar