Sunday, January 19, 2025
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All cats are grey.
Aries
21 Mar – 19 Apr
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If you're feeling nervous, just remember: fake it 'till you make it. Unless you're an Aries, in which case, just be yourself.
Taurus
20 Apr – 20 May
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Your radiators need some love too, spend some time with them today.
Gemini
21 May – 20 Jun
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Your week will involve a formidable struggle between a desire for freedom and the desire to not pay an overdraft fee. Choose wisely.
Cancer
21 Jun – 22 Jul
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Today is your lucky day. Unfortunately, it only comes around every 3 years.
Leo
23 Jul – 22 Aug
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You will be able to hear what animals think today. You will discover that they are just as confused about life as humans are. This will lead to a greater appreciation of the world around you and the shared experience of being alive.
Virgo
23 Aug – 22 Sep
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You will receive a call from a number you don't recognise.
Libra
23 Sep – 22 Oct
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If you value your kidneys do not make any plans to go to concerts today.
Scorpio
23 Oct – 21 Nov
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Your toaster will develop a mind of its own and insist on making only smiley face toast for the entire day.
Sagittarius
22 Nov – 21 Dec
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Don't trust the sparkling water, it's a trick
Capricorn
22 Dec – 19 Jan
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A pipe will burst in your home and you will be covered in icy slush.
Aquarius
20 Jan – 18 Feb
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Hear the water whispering beneath the seafloor
Pisces
19 Feb – 20 Mar