Monday, December 23, 2024
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Burn calories with firewise advice from a British earl
21 Mar – 19 Apr
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Your television will start broadcasting messages from an alien civilization.
20 Apr – 20 May
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You'll be asked to bring a salad to a party, so you will make a potato salad.
21 May – 20 Jun
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A wild ferret will disrupt a meeting you are attending today. Hopefully it's a cute ferret.
21 Jun – 22 Jul
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An unusual cosmic energy will cause an abundance of cacti to appear in your life, which you will need to learn to live with and appreciate, despite the spines and general dryness.
23 Jul – 22 Aug
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An unexpected promotion at work will lead to a sudden influx of cash and an obsession with unusual hobbies like ping pong or curling.
23 Aug – 22 Sep
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Prepare for a strange coincidence as you accidentally match your neighbor's outfit, prompting an awkward but amusing encounter.
23 Sep – 22 Oct
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Today you will be visited by a famous archaeologist – but she has terrible ideas about fancy dress. Lose the mustache.
23 Oct – 21 Nov
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Your mailbox will become a portal to a parallel dimension where mail is delivered by unicorns.
22 Nov – 21 Dec
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You will find a lost library card and will use it to borrow a stack of stolen books to read on your vacation
22 Dec – 19 Jan
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Beware of mischievous garden gnomes plotting to steal your shoes.
20 Jan – 18 Feb
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Believe it or not, a marmoset will be behind the wheel if you take the train today.
19 Feb – 20 Mar
