Friday, October 4, 2024
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Let a quick-witted Aquarius suggest bedtime stories
Aries
21 Mar – 19 Apr
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You'll find a semi-sentient cookie that will charm you with its crafty personality.
Taurus
20 Apr – 20 May
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From quick-witted retorts to expertly crafted zingers, your tongue will be sharper than a surgeon's scalpel.
Gemini
21 May – 20 Jun
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You are teleported into a parallel universe where every conversation ends with a question mark?
Cancer
21 Jun – 22 Jul
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Have you ever wondered what's on the other side of the world? Today's the day you find out!
Leo
23 Jul – 22 Aug
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You never finished your thesis.
Virgo
23 Aug – 22 Sep
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This year, you will embark on a journey to discover the ultimate hobby. Your quest to find the perfect activity that sparks joy, stimulates your mind, and provides a sense of fulfillment will be a voyage of self-discovery.
Libra
23 Sep – 22 Oct
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Today, you will have a profound intuition about an upcoming event. Act on this intuition, even if it seems out of character for you.
Scorpio
23 Oct – 21 Nov
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What’s done is done.
Sagittarius
22 Nov – 21 Dec
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There's a 50% chance your middle name is James.
Capricorn
22 Dec – 19 Jan
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It is time to wash your hands. You will also need to wash your shoes.
Aquarius
20 Jan – 18 Feb
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Today, you're going to discover you've been paying your bills twice as long as everyone else.
Pisces
19 Feb – 20 Mar