Tuesday, December 12, 2023
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A dog will lick your face today.
Aries
21 Mar – 19 Apr
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Be weary of all old people on the beach today, especially those offering to help you bury your new pet.
Taurus
20 Apr – 20 May
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It is okay to be afraid. In fact, a little fear can be good for you. unless it's a fear of velcro, in which case, seek professional help.
Gemini
21 May – 20 Jun
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The postal service will deliver an incredible package containing your favourite type of candy.
Cancer
21 Jun – 22 Jul
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Today you will be buried alive
Leo
23 Jul – 22 Aug
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You are experiencing vertigo today, so take it easy on the stairs
Virgo
23 Aug – 22 Sep
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It's important to love yourself. So if you want to go to the gym, go. Or get a burger. It's your choice!
Libra
23 Sep – 22 Oct
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You'll suddenly realize you hate all the things you've been using to cut your hair.
Scorpio
23 Oct – 21 Nov
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After years of work, you will finally be invited to exhibit at the Louvre
Sagittarius
22 Nov – 21 Dec
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Today you will decide not to be afraid of heights
Capricorn
22 Dec – 19 Jan
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Haunt the Dead Sea with a Libra
Aquarius
20 Jan – 18 Feb
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Today you will win the lottery at least twice
Pisces
19 Feb – 20 Mar