Friday, December 8, 2023
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Today you will be high-fived by a chimp
Aries
21 Mar – 19 Apr
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Your favourite pen will gain the ability to write poetry when you least expect it.
Taurus
20 Apr – 20 May
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You will accidentally unlock your talents for spontaneous self combustion. Unleash the passion within!
Gemini
21 May – 20 Jun
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Your car will not start today. It's trying to tell you something.
Cancer
21 Jun – 22 Jul
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A chance encounter with a street performer will lead to an impromptu dance-off, and you will discover an unexpected talent for breakdancing.
Leo
23 Jul – 22 Aug
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Today is your lucky day. Unfortunately, it only comes around every 3 years.
Virgo
23 Aug – 22 Sep
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5000 glares from a social Goose are inevitable.
Libra
23 Sep – 22 Oct
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Today you will discover that you can't eat avocado anymore
Scorpio
23 Oct – 21 Nov
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The chances of rain today are directly proportional to the amount of work you've put off.
Sagittarius
22 Nov – 21 Dec
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Today you will create an incredible fresh and spicy salad dressing
Capricorn
22 Dec – 19 Jan
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Today you will be visited by two grooms
Aquarius
20 Jan – 18 Feb
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Don't take life too seriously, no one gets out alive.
Pisces
19 Feb – 20 Mar