Wednesday, November 15, 2023
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Your favourite mug will gain the ability to predict the future through the patterns in your coffee. It's time for some divination!
Aries
21 Mar – 19 Apr
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Today you will wake up and realize you've been writing poems all night and will win a prize
Taurus
20 Apr – 20 May
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It's time for a cup of tea and a Danish pastry.
Gemini
21 May – 20 Jun
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If a crow appears on your shoulder today, give it food.
Cancer
21 Jun – 22 Jul
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Let a quick-witted Aquarius suggest bedtime stories
Leo
23 Jul – 22 Aug
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Today you will dance in a library for no apparent reason
Virgo
23 Aug – 22 Sep
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You will receive a surprise delivery of 100 rubber ducks.
Libra
23 Sep – 22 Oct
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You're an onion. You have layers.
Scorpio
23 Oct – 21 Nov
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Today you'll suddenly discover you can trigger spontaneous puberty on youths by getting close to them
Sagittarius
22 Nov – 21 Dec
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A fortune cookie will reveal a profound and life-changing prophecy. Take it with a grain of MSG.
Capricorn
22 Dec – 19 Jan
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Today you will be rehomed to an island. It is said you will not miss the mainland at all.
Aquarius
20 Jan – 18 Feb
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You are not the sassiest person in the room.
Pisces
19 Feb – 20 Mar