Sunday, October 22, 2023
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Today you will accidentally turn around
Aries
21 Mar – 19 Apr
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All your abandoned pasta and rice will finally have a chance to shine in an original dish you create today!
Taurus
20 Apr – 20 May
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Time spent with a book is worth less than that with your next-door-neighbour's ferret.
Gemini
21 May – 20 Jun
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For the first time in history, an ant will win a Nobel Prize. Unfortunately, no one will know, because you're the only one who can understand their speech.
Cancer
21 Jun – 22 Jul
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Today you will discover that you have been living in a dream all along and must now wake up... but do you really want to?
Leo
23 Jul – 22 Aug
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You will never have to look for a car again.
Virgo
23 Aug – 22 Sep
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You will be asked to eat an extra one hundred calories today, but it will be worth it.
Libra
23 Sep – 22 Oct
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You'll have a sudden infatuation with lava lamps. Be careful, it's highly addictive.
Scorpio
23 Oct – 21 Nov
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It's said that we are our own past and future. If that's the case, you should be an exceptionally good liar.
Sagittarius
22 Nov – 21 Dec
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You'll spend hours trying to get rid of a sticky substance that is somehow stuck to your hand.
Capricorn
22 Dec – 19 Jan
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You will suddenly grow an extra limb that will tie up your other limbs in knots.
Aquarius
20 Jan – 18 Feb
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It's a good day to bench press your pet.
Pisces
19 Feb – 20 Mar
