Tuesday, September 5, 2023
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Today you will be mistaken for a famous celebrity and asked for autographs.
Aries
21 Mar – 19 Apr
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Today you will suddenly feel a desire to clean up your garden and will start digging a hole
Taurus
20 Apr – 20 May
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You will receive some incredible news today. Just make sure you don't drop your phone while you're reading it.
Gemini
21 May – 20 Jun
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Today you will rise above the Earth's atmosphere; you will fly in a spaceship
Cancer
21 Jun – 22 Jul
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There's a 50% chance your middle name is James.
Leo
23 Jul – 22 Aug
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You can save a life today, if you choose to.
Virgo
23 Aug – 22 Sep
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If you see an angry-looking animal today, try to tickle it.
Libra
23 Sep – 22 Oct
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You dream about having a bowl cut and being a powerful wizard.
Scorpio
23 Oct – 21 Nov
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You will receive an unexpected proposal today, and you will be forced to choose between two equally good options. Choose the third option.
Sagittarius
22 Nov – 21 Dec
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If you're feeling seasick, try looking at the horizon.
Capricorn
22 Dec – 19 Jan
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Today, you'll have a eureka moment where you realize that life is made up of 85 percent pretending
Aquarius
20 Jan – 18 Feb
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Something you have been seeking is right under your nose. You will find it, right after you realize that you have been breathing through your nose the entire time.
Pisces
19 Feb – 20 Mar
