Monday, September 4, 2023
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What happens in Vegas today, stays in Vegas. Unless you tell everyone.
21 Mar – 19 Apr
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Your television will start broadcasting messages from an alien civilization.
20 Apr – 20 May
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Climb a mountain with a Libra
21 May – 20 Jun
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Your mailbox will become a portal to a parallel dimension where mail is delivered by unicorns.
21 Jun – 22 Jul
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You will become obsessed with font choice when writing things today.
23 Jul – 22 Aug
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You'll accidentally turn into a cat, and realize you don't know where you've been all day.
23 Aug – 22 Sep
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The scent of mocha coffee will recently invade your apartment, doubling your heart rate
23 Sep – 22 Oct
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You'll think you've found the perfect insult for someone until you realize it's directed at yourself.
23 Oct – 21 Nov
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You'll get an urge to join the army. Sadly, you'll be rejected for being too nice.
22 Nov – 21 Dec
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Be prepared for an unexpected encounter with a celebrity doppelganger. Take a selfie for proof!
22 Dec – 19 Jan
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Fight a whole army with a Sagittarius man
20 Jan – 18 Feb
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You will discover you are colour blind but only to gamma rays.
19 Feb – 20 Mar
